Check Your Child’s Sleep Before You Worry About Behaviour

If your child is struggling with behaviour, big emotions or focus, sleep is the first place to look. In this video Donna explains how tiredness shows up as “bad behaviour”, the signs that sleep is the real issue, and what to change first.

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Newborn Sleep & Settling: Gentle Support for Exhausted Mummas

Struggling with newborn sleep, short naps or unsettled nights? Discover gentle newborn sleep routines, wake windows, tired signs and responsive settling tips. Practical, nurturing sleep support for exhausted mummas, with no Cry It Out. Helping your newborn feel safe, secure and supported from day one.

Newborn Sleep Foundations: Nurturing Support for Exhausted Parents

Mumma, are you exhausted from sleepless nights, short naps and a newborn who only wants to sleep in your arms? Are you wondering whether your baby needs a newborn sleep routine or why they seem wide awake at 2 am?

Firstly, you’re not alone! And secondly, your newborn isn’t doing anything wrong.

Welcome to the Parenting Collective Newborn Sleep Learning Hub, where you’ll find gentle, practical advice on newborn sleep, wake windows, bedtime routines and responsive settling.

As a Certified Secure Sleep Specialist and Conscious Parenting Coach, I believe newborn sleep should be nurturing, flexible and centred around connection. No rigid schedules, no unrealistic expectations and absolutely no Cry It Out.

Understanding Newborn Sleep Patterns

Newborn sleep looks very different from adult sleep. During the first three months, babies generally sleep around 14–17 hours across 24 hours, waking frequently for feeds, comfort and connection.

If your newborn won’t sleep for long stretches, it doesn’t mean you’ve created bad habits. Their sleep patterns are still developing.

Understanding what’s normal can help you feel more confident and reduce the pressure to make your baby sleep through the night before they’re developmentally ready.

Creating a Gentle Newborn Sleep Routine

A newborn sleep routine doesn’t need to follow the clock.

Instead, think of a flexible rhythm that includes feeding, cuddles, nappy changes, short periods of awake time and opportunities for sleep.

A simple newborn bedtime routine might include dimming the lights, changing their nappy, offering a feed and enjoying some quiet cuddles before gently settling them into their safe sleep space.

Consistency can be helpful, but responding to your baby’s individual needs always comes first.

Newborn Wake Windows and Tired Signs

Confused about newborn wake windows?

You’re not the only one, Mumma!

Wake windows describe how long your baby is awake between sleeps. They can provide a useful starting point, but they’re not strict rules.

Rather than watching the clock constantly, learn to recognise your newborn’s tired signs.

These might include yawning, turning away from stimulation, becoming quieter or appearing unsettled.

Understanding newborn sleep cues can help you offer rest before your little one becomes overtired.

How to Settle a Newborn Without Cry It Out

If your newborn won’t settle unless they’re being held, rocked or fed, please know that this is incredibly common.

Your baby has spent nine months surrounded by warmth, movement and familiar sounds. Wanting closeness is completely natural.

Gentle newborn settling may involve cuddling, rocking, feeding, soft singing and offering calm reassurance.

You are not spoiling your newborn by responding to their needs.

Always follow safe sleep recommendations by placing your baby on their back in their own safe, firm, flat sleep space. Keep their face and head uncovered and the sleep space free of pillows, loose bedding and soft toys.

Newborn Short Naps and Catnapping

Are your newborn’s naps lasting only 20–40 minutes?

Short naps and newborn catnapping can be perfectly normal, particularly during the early weeks when sleep cycles are still developing.

Rather than focusing on making every nap longer, consider your baby’s overall sleep, feeding and wellbeing.

Some babies need additional comfort to settle. Others may benefit from a quieter environment or adjustments to their awake time.

If you’re struggling with newborn contact naps or your baby won’t sleep in the bassinet, gentle support can help you explore what your little one needs while keeping sleep safety the priority.

Newborn Witching Hour and Unsettled Evenings

Does your newborn become particularly unsettled in the late afternoon or evening?

This is often called the newborn witching hour.

During this time, babies may cry more, cluster feed or struggle to settle.

Try reducing stimulation, offering feeds and cuddles and creating a calm environment.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, ask for support and take a moment to regulate yourself.

Your baby doesn’t need you to be perfectly calm all the time. They need you to keep returning with love and reassurance.

If crying is unusual or persistent or your baby seems unwell, seek medical advice.

Newborn Day and Night Confusion

If your newborn sleeps beautifully during the day but seems ready for a party at midnight, their developing body clock may be contributing.

During the day, allow natural light and gentle interaction when your baby is awake.

At night, keep lighting dim and interactions quiet while continuing to respond to feeding and comfort needs.

Over time, these gentle differences can support the development of their natural sleep rhythms.

Frequently Asked Questions About Newborn Sleep

How Much Sleep Does a Newborn Need?

Many newborns sleep approximately 14–17 hours over 24 hours, although individual needs vary. Sleep is usually spread throughout the day and night.

Does My Newborn Need a Sleep Schedule?

No. Newborn sleep schedules should be flexible and responsive rather than rigid. Feeding, growth and your baby’s individual needs are more important than following exact times.

Why Won’t My Newborn Sleep in the Bassinet?

Your baby may be seeking closeness, feeling uncomfortable or finding the transition from your arms difficult. Gentle reassurance and safe, consistent settling practices can help.  Download Safe Sleep FREE Guide

Is Feeding My Newborn to Sleep a Bad Habit?

Absolutely not. Feeding to sleep is a normal and comforting experience for many newborns. You don’t need to remove this connection during the early weeks.

When Will My Newborn Sleep Through the Night?

Every baby develops at their own pace. Frequent night waking and feeding are normal during the newborn stage. The focus should be on safe sleep and responsive care rather than rushing longer nights.

Free Newborn Sleep Guides and Resources

Mumma, you don’t have to navigate newborn sleep alone.

At Parenting Collective, you’ll find helpful resources covering newborn wake windows, sleep charts, tired signs, gentle settling and age-appropriate sleep routines.

Whether you’re struggling with short naps, unsettled evenings or simply wondering what’s normal, I’m here to help.

Explore my free newborn sleep resources and my Nurturing Newborn Guide, created to give you practical knowledge, confidence and reassurance.

Personalised Newborn Sleep Support

Sometimes reading another article isn’t quite enough, especially when you’re running on very little sleep.

As a Certified Secure Sleep Specialist and Conscious Parenting Coach, I support families in Perth, across Australia and worldwide with nurturing newborn sleep guidance.

My approach is gentle, responsive and tailored to your baby. No Cry It Out, no judgement and no pressure to follow a rigid schedule.

If you’re feeling exhausted or unsure about your newborn’s sleep, I’d love to support you.

Book your FREE 15-minute sleep chat and discover how we can make this season feel a little more manageable.

Because you deserve support too, Mumma.

With love,

Donna Moala

Keep reading

Free 15-minute chat

Not sure if sleep is behind it?

Book a free 15-minute chat with Donna. We’ll look at your child’s sleep and tell you honestly whether it’s the place to start.

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Hello, mama and welcome to Parenting Collective. I am [music] Donna Moana. I am a sleep specialist. I work with
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newborns [music] up to 10-year-old children, but I love love working with newborn families. I work with families one-on-one. I have so many fantastic
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resources uh when you become [music] a new parent. And there is such so much information out there that is so unregulated and just causes so much
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stress and anxiety. [music] But I’m here to let you all know that we can absolutely create beautiful, nurturing, supportive, [music]
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secure sleep foundations for our newborns. I work with families oneonone throughout the world. I have so many [music] amazing resources for you. So, I
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have recorded a beautiful conversation [music] with a beautiful mom who’s just finished up her threew week one-on-one
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package with her newborn. Uh, what was happening before we [music] met and the outcome. So, I hope you enjoy it as much
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as we did. And please reach out for your free 15-minute chat or any information at all that you’d like on your newborn adventure.
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Danny, my beautiful client, my beautiful mama of a newborn. Thank you so much for hopping on and we can talk about your
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experience. We’ve just finished up our [music] three or four weeks together with your beautiful newborn, Leighton. Yes. Thank you for joining us.
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I’m so thrilled. I’m so thrilled. What I want to do is just quickly share your experience because sh working with newborns for me is just such a joy and
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not I don’t get to do it that much because everyone’s a little bit frightened. So I’d love to ask you. So when we when we met Leighton was 10
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weeks. So um what I saw when we when you reached out was you were doing the best you could as everybody does. Um she had
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reflux. She had all of these underlying things to that you had to sort of get on top of. And the most incredible thing that you guys were doing, so yourself
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and your husband Brendan, you were literally having her sleep on you 24 hours a day. So you had an owlet sock.
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You knew about the SIDS. You were doing the safety, safety, safety, safety because of course we know we’re not supposed to do that, but you couldn’t do
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anything else because she would scream her guts out. Um, and you would take it in turns overnight to stay awake and let her sleep on you.
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Yes, pretty much. [laughter] So tell me your journey. So that’s in you’re amazing and like I said all moms try and do the best dad’s trying to do the best
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they can. So you reached out. Tell me that journey of like actually knowing that you could and then us meeting and a little bit about the journey.
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Yeah. So, as you mentioned, um the first couple of weeks have been quite rough because um our baby didn’t want to lay flat on her back and every time we tried
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to put her in her bassinet um to, you know, sleep overnight or whatever, she will wake up after, you know, a sleep cycle and she will just pretty much
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scream for the rest of the night because of her reflux. Um so we just ended up giving up completely on the bassinet,
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moving on from it and just um slept with her on top of us or like had her sleep on top of us for the first couple of weeks.
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Um and then one of my friends mentioned um that you know she’s had a call with you in the past before and that you’re
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really good. And so yeah, so I spoke to my husband and um Nathan started slowly improving with her reflux. um she
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started showing signs that she was a bit more um ready to lay horizontal um and she wasn’t as uncomfortable as she was
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in the past. Um so then we decided to give you a call and see if you can help us. And the reason why I think
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ultimately I decided to use you and go with you know a sleep consultant in general was um I was just so frustrated
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at the internet because you know the internet talks about all of these safe things to do and and yes that’s great
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but it doesn’t actually give you any guidance for parents who are in you know a battle of reflux or other things that
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babies struggle with. And so it made me just feel like a failure as a parent because I was, you know, kind of like,
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well, I can’t do any of this stuff. And um I don’t know what else to do. And so then I I just thought I’m just going to
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get a professional who knows what they’re talking about to give me some guidance and um show me and teach me how
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to um get her comfortable in the bassinet and get her comfortable on her back. And so now four weeks later um our
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baby has pretty much been sleeping in her bassinet from the first day we started working together.
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Lot of Yeah. You go.
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Yeah. Yeah. No. Amazing. And and that’s you you explained it beautifully is that it’s really well and good if the things that is everywhere and so accessible to
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everyone um on what to do with babies and baby sleep doesn’t work for your baby. What do you do? And there’s so thousands and thousands of moms like
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yourself that just feel like that’s if you hadn’t somehow found me. And this is what we were saying yesterday because it was our final call. Not final forever of
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course, but final as in in our time together in regards to sleep support. Um you would sadly be back in the same space, you know, and that to me is
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mind-blowing. And that’s why we’ve done uh wanted to have a quick chat to share you because you’re it’s exactly what needs to be
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done for moms that and dads but particularly moms especially when you’re breastfeeding like that and that there’s this circle of like trying to get all
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this you know this what’s sort of on the treadmill isn’t I don’t know how to explain it of like trying to get answers to get a support but then what it actually ends up done is make making you
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feel like crap as a mother that you can’t help your baby that doesn’t help anyone.
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Yeah. Yeah. And the internet I find um you know especially sleepreated in general baby stuff related but as a first-time mom you know I didn’t have
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any information as to how to navigate these struggles and the internet are just there’s just so much information out there that you know one person says
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this and then the other person says this and then sleepreated follow this and follow that and so it just makes you
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feel so overwhelmed and confused about what to do. So I find, you know, going with someone like you who knows all of
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these things and have, you know, training and experience and life experience, you’ve really supported me in um working and navigating through all of the struggles um along the journey.
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And um I find that’s that was the biggest thing for me was having you and you having access to you all the time
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and being able to send you a message and say, “Hey, Donna, this is you know what I’m struggling with. What do I do?” and you know jumping on a phone call with
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you and you just tell me um to adjust things as we go and it really has helped us to find that sweet spot which I’m very appreciative of.
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Oh my gosh, it’s just makes me so excited and you know I wish I could deep dive into all that we went through but when I start with any family and and
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like I said newborns are one of my favorites newborn families is it’s and you said this yesterday because we had a great conversation and you were kind of
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at a point of complete and utter exhaustion in your mind. thought you just want dot points, Donna. Just tell me what I need to do. And but I was
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like, let’s just go with your parental instinct. And you were like, really?
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Like, but if you look back on reflection, it was a bit of both, you know, really. It was like a little bit of quite a lot of
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guidance, but gentle guidance, but also um a little trial and error, meaning I’d suggest something and like you said, you
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and your husband Brendon would go, “I don’t know. I don’t know.” And then you get, “Oh, okay. That was okay.” And that’s the journey for all of the parents that I work with, but
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particularly with newborns because for me, you know, I don’t know I’ve said this to you, duty of care for me is utmost the most important thing. And
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duty of care meaning the safety of the baby. So again, you were in a situation that she would not lay down. Like you said, you had come like a post-traumatic
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stress of actually laying her down cuz at sometimes you’d lay her down and trying to lay down the beginning of the night and then she’d scream all night.
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You couldn’t even get her in there. So you were even frightened to lay her down, you know. So I have to support you to trust me enough to go, let’s give it a little bit. But in sometimes I’m a
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little bit, oh gosh, I hope that doesn’t happen. Um, but you know, the thing is is the trust that you had in me as well.
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But getting back to what you had to do, like I said, you literally had to set each other’s alarms and you sat there awake for the hours that was your shift
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with her on there with an owlet, which the outwlet is the very good for SIDS.
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you know, this scary thought of them stopping breathing and I love the outlet for that. I don’t love the outlet for
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too much um access to the sleep patterns of babies, but the breathing part is just huge. So, you did that with utter
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utter safety. You know, as a sleep specialist, I can never recommend co-sleeping or sleeping on you, but that’s cuz I’m not there. But when we talk about it, like you know, we you
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still did some co-sleeping. You still had to have a sleep on you. For me, I just said, “Okay, have the hour on. stay awake, you know, and we had to work
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through it. So, it’s not cookie cutter, you know. No. And you, you know, she was amazing. And the and the thing is those first few days, yes, she was having time
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in the bassinet, but she still was having a lot of time on you. Yeah.
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You know, it wasn’t all of a sudden put her in there and off we go.
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Yeah. The first two nights um she you know well probably the first week actually was um she would sleep majority
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of the night in her bassinet but then um from about you know 4:00 in the morning she would wake up and um either my
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husband and I would just uh finish the rest of the morning with her on top of us because she kind of would just had
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enough. Um but slowly we started triing um again with your guidance and you
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reminding me every time we um have a phone call saying like put her back at 4:00 after her 4:00 feed and see what she does, you know, give it
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a go and if she doesn’t do it then that’s okay. Finish the rest of the sleep on you, but give it a go, you know. And it’s just that encouragement
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from you that kept me going, okay, I need to try it and see what happens. And if it doesn’t happen, then it’s okay if I finish the rest of the sleep on top of me.
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Um, and yeah, now she sleeps pretty much till 8:00 every morning. [laughter] And you you were saying yesterday, and
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this is where I I I can’t talk about it enough, and again, it’s from all ages of kiddos, they get touched out, right? But
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because what happens is we’re so want our babies to be okay. So, we have them on us all the time. And it’s okay, not
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okay for the parents, but what you’re seeing um already is she actually is starting to push off you a bit for sex
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one. And like you said, so what ends up happening everybody who might listen who might have a newborn is you get to enjoy motherhood better because you’re having
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a rest and you can’t wait for that little baby to wake up. Whereas you still obviously love being a mom. You love her so much. But if you reflect
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back, you think you’re not the same person. you weren’t the same person as you were four weeks ago to now and you can’t wait to feed her at night and you
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can’t wait for her to wake up and it’s just such a thing.
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Yeah, 100%. I think um you know for me you know postpartum is already quite hard and and navigating that especially
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as a first-time mom but looking back um thinking about oh when when did I start feeling like I’m really enjoying this
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baby and it’s probably about a month ago and I think you know for me I I kind of now feel kind of sad because we’re at
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the point now where she almost puts herself to sleep at night I know I know it’s so funny isn’t it? is like my baby. Yeah.
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Yeah. I just put her down and I give her a little bit of support by, you know, rubbing her belly or whatever, but I don’t need to rock her anymore or and
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sometimes she does need that, but most of the time she actually wants to be put down and she doesn’t need you to hold her. Um, so yeah, I’m excited to to feed
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her at night when she wakes up or in the mornings when I go and get her and she gives me a smile because she had good sleep. But um it just makes me feel like I’ve got a
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nervous system reset as well because I don’t have a baby on me 24/7. That’s right.
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Um so I feel like I’ve got the ability to have good night’s sleep and just have that little bit of time with my husband as well at night. You know, we have dinner together.
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Yeah.
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Yeah. And so these small things you don’t think makes a big difference, but it actually really does make a huge
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difference in the postpartum recovery and and experience of a newborn.
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Yeah. And the thing is for me, oh look, you know, you know, you’ve got to know me enough how passionate I am about helping families and I just, you
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know, it’s one by one, you know, but if I just think how many other moms are out there like yourselves, you know, and then you have spread the word in your
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little um in your little mother’s group of in the area that you live in Perth.
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So, I’m helping two of your friends and you know the other friend of they’re having such success and we’ve started with the third friend and I’m just the
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the the passion has been reignited. Not that it was never there, but it’s really hard to tap into the newborn parents because it’s a tough time and you’re
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already overwhelmed with so much um information. It’s very hard for me to say, “Hey, I can help you with your sleep.” So, that’s why I was like, “If
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you’re okay, can we chat about it today?” Because, you know, in a month’s time, say something might happen, you’ve still got me. This is what the why I love meeting my families at newborns.
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I’m like, you can have me till you’re 18, you know, like I’m always here for you. And so then worries about the progressions and I’m like, don’t worry
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about it. But when things like now she’s mastering that skill, she might have some hiccups. You’re going to contact me. What’s going on? Yeah, I’ll talk about weight windows or what
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happens. I’ll just ask a few questions and then you’ll adjust and then she’ll get back on track. And that’s the joy that I have all of these years. It’s not
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that I work with you now and then off you never hear from me again. It’s like a community that I’ve built. Um, and I’m here for you and I’m so excited and I’m
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so thrilled that you get to enjoy motherhood. Uh, even more.
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Thank you. And yeah, I think um if I can give one piece of advice or uh encouragement and that’s why I said to
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my friends from a mother’s group is the internet tells us that newborns are too small to you know have sleep support or
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um I wouldn’t I don’t want to call it sleep training as such because sleep training is such a big word but you know when again when you go on
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the internet it’s like you can’t do anything sleepwise with a newborn until they’re at least 12 weeks old or you
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And it’s just not the case. And um you can have so much support before that.
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And for me when I you know when we had our first phone call I said to you I don’t want to wait till the four month mark hits and we go through that
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regression and then you know it’s possibly 10 times harder. I want to start before and put good foundations in
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for myself and for my baby. And that’s when I um you know when I spoke to my friends from the mother’s group when they told me that they were struggling I
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just encouraged them and said don’t wait you know just have the help and support and they’re so happy that they also decided to
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I’m always so grateful. I think I’ll be grateful to I think I’ll be doing this till my last day on earth, honestly. And it just it get I get more and more
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excited, you know, because life is really complicated and stressful and way more overwhelming than it was 5 10 years
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ago. And if we can just come back to human biology makeup of humans, we need connection.
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We need to understand that our kids, our babies can master these incredible skills. I don’t want to call it sleep training at all, but you know, can’t you
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think of like potty training? You have to do that otherwise they’re going to wee and poo everywhere, aren’t they?
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Yeah. So, I don’t like using that word because it’s got a it’s got such negative connotations attached to it.
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But it is um creating beautiful sleep foundations.
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Yeah. Yeah. 100%. And if you do it uh consistently, then I think you know you see the results like we are starting to
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see now four weeks later where our baby is mastering the skill of of putting herself to sleep and soothing herself.
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So yeah, it’s just such a great great experience and so grateful to you. Oh my goodness, I’m so grateful for you.
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And the other thing with this too is there are going to be ups and downs like I said and hiccups. It’s not peachy perfect. It’s not that’s what I keep trying to say to everybody and I would
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have said to you it’s this is great and you’re like okay then and then we might have a rough night and it she might have woken 20 times. Okay, that’s really
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normal. Let’s assess that. And I think it’s just surrendering to the fact of normal behavior. Now the normal behavior is yes ups and downs but if we can
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master that beautiful independently going down then everything keeps flowing through illnesses whatever and that’s again reaching out to me but um it is
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just such a beautiful thing that babies are missing out on and parents are missing out on because of all of this negative talk and I just you know the
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more one-on-one we can spread the word and thank you so much for being brave enough to you know reach out to then
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trust me. Like I said to you, it’s not just you were saying how grateful you are and I’m not, you know, like I’m so grateful for you because if I can have
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um someone who wasn’t so open to change, it would be very difficult. And that’s no judgment if a mother felt but they didn’t want to do that. I’m not saying
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that. This is never having a go at anybody else who might not want to do it. Um but the joy of a rested mother for me,
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you can take on the world, don’t you think? when you when there’s a little bit more sleep and that enjoyment of motherhood.
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Yeah. Everything feels so much easier when you’ve had good sleep. And sometimes good sleep means four stretches of two hours because your
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baby wakes up every two hours. You know, it doesn’t necessarily mean good sleep is eight hours because with a newborn that’s very rare.
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But um but you know, you wake up in the morning and and you’ve had three stretches of 3 hours. That’s still a
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lot. It’s a lot of sleep for you. And and I just find the world feels easier.
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Every challenge that you face with your your baby is feels easier where if you’ve had nights where you know you
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didn’t sleep very well and you’re tired um everything just feels so much harder and um
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challenging you know so sleep makes such a such a big difference. And then on the back of that, right, is yes, you have
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those nights and we might focus on the nights, but when you’ve got a newborn or a baby and they’re on you all day and you can’t hardly go to the toilet, you can’t have a shower, you can’t eat, the
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combination of the day and night and then you’re breastfeeding, so the baby’s sucking on your breasts all day. It’s a lot for a human, you know, and you know,
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on reflection, you’ve had so much amazing progre progress and it will only get better and there’ll be ups and downs, but the reality is even sort of
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our last week, she she wasn’t doing a lot of the she’d sort of reverted to not wanting to sleep in the bassinet again during the day. And I said to her, don’t worry about it. Okay, let’s do one or
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two short ones in there and then have one on you. So I think the biggest thing I want to get across is it can be better than what it is if it’s feeling
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stressful number one and every child’s different but they c you can have time when the baby’s not on you. So you know if you’re in a day have having five 30
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minute naps that’s 30 minutes every every few hours that you’re having a bit of a break you know. Yeah that’s important.
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Yeah for sure. And like even this morning I was putting my baby down for her first nap in her cot um you know in
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her own room kind of just practicing and yeah she had just over I think just under 40 minutes in there.
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Amazing. Um, and I was able to make myself another coffee and, you know, clean the kitchen and just do things that I, it’s kind of like just me time,
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you know, wash my face and all of those things. And, yeah, just makes your day feels so much so much better than um, having a
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baby on you. And and the first couple of weeks as well, I was saying to my friends, I’ve mastered going to the toilet with a baby in my hands.
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I [laughter] know. Isn’t that crazy?
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It’s You sure will. And and again, you know, if if if people are feeling happy with whatever’s going in their if they hear
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this and they’re like, “Oh, you know, feeling a bit uneasy.” This is not the conversation. We’re not ever making anyone feel uneasy. If they are so happy
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with everything they’re doing, like I said to you many times, if someone makes you feel yucky, anxious, whatever, either stop listening, just grin if it’s
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an actual human, and just do what makes you feel happy.
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You know, that that is the biggest thing, isn’t it? And and the thing is I think like again any mother growing a human which you know most of us have to
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do um and you know pushing it out cutting it out healing breastfeeding if you want to. It’s so much of a change
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for our bodies and we are allowed to be able to have a rest. We’re allowed to have a break where you can go to the toilet without your baby attached to you onehanded.
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Yeah. Yes. 100%. And it always in such a short period of time too. you kind of, you know, you adjust so quickly. So,
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yeah, we need that time to to just reset and um like I said to you, often it’s for us a nervous system reset as well.
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You know, not having a baby attached to us and we get touched out as well. And so, for us, it’s also Yeah, as a mom,
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it’s nice to be able to put my baby down and now being excited to go pick her up again. And it’s just so lovely.
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Oh, thank you so much. Thank you so much for being so brave to come and do this as well because not everyone’s comfortable doing it. But I just so
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excited with like I said the reignite like I do I don’t do many newborns over the year because people are so worried but if we’ve got someone like yourself
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to share their story and then you know we’ve got your two friends doing it and they’re I just it’s just that’s the way we can get through to beautiful moms out there that might be struggling that
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think I that this is not achievable. I think your case case but you know when I no one’s I don’t sort of um you know
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rank people on where they’re at but you know what you were doing as mom and dads was just so selfless
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um to be taking in turns you know to have her all night and you were doing it and you would have continued doing it
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and but the thing is if someone like your family can get to the place that you are where you were uh is quite a
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miracle, I think. You know, I just I love it. Love it for you.
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Yeah. No, I I didn’t know what this would look like four weeks down the track. And if anything, the day when we had our first phone call, I thought to
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myself, 3 weeks or four weeks is not nearly enough. Um but yeah, I just yesterday was our last phone call and um
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I just remembered over the weekend weekend thinking, I think I’m okay. like I’m okay letting
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like having this last phone call and yes it’s nice to have you as support but you know it was just nice to know okay we’ve had three or four weeks of hard work and
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I’m now equipped to um handle this and navigate through this um yeah which I didn’t have four weeks ago
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exactly like and like you said and I’ve already said in here is like I think what what I really want for moms is to bring back to have their own mother
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instinct because you know that sort of please tell me what to do is a little bit of the world that we live in. We want answers. We want it fixed.
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Excuse me. And so, we’re all living like that. So, I I’m I’m sort of old school of thinking. I’m not going to do it for you. I’m here for you 100% of the way,
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but I want you to feel exactly how you just explained, empowered, and he’s my he she’s my baby and I love her and I
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feel really confident with with what I’ve been able to support, learn, but also support her with because that’s, you know, you will have me for the rest
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of your life if you want. But um you know it’s more about you because you’re her mom.
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Yeah. And um just one more thing that I think uh was one of the biggest things that I took out of this four weeks is um
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just not putting my baby in like a box or a set schedule. Um, you know, again, the internet tells us, “Oh, your baby
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has to wake up at seven and needs to go to bed at this time and you need this amount of time and then resettle and change and feed and then you need to put
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them down for a nap at this time.” And it’s kind of, you know, life just gets in the way. And so I found, but again,
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before I started with you, I was like, “Oh, but she won’t be home for her nap if I go and have a coffee with my friend. So, I’m just not going to go for
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coffee. And it’s kind of like you’ve taught me that it’s okay to, you know, adjust and and feel the confidence to adjust her
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schedule as I go. And and feeling that like again being equipped to go, okay, she has had a bit of a shorter nap here.
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Maybe we’ll try and go for a longer nap to try and get her back on track and not feel so like scheduled. My whole day is
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scheduled and she’s in the schedule because every baby is different and every day is different and it just depends on
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what kind of, you know, she goes through growth spurts and and she has all of those in between as well. And so it’s
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just too hard to try and put a onesize fit all to your baby because it just doesn’t work. Um, so that was one of the
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things that I take from, you know, working with you is having that confidence to go, um, let her sleep in today, you know, let her
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sleep an hour later because she had an hour later bedtime or I know she woke up quite frequently last night, so she’s probably needs that extra hour. And
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that’s okay. Even though the internet tells me my daughter has to wake up at 7:00 every morning, I don’t do that. I’m like, I let her sleep to 8:00 and usually 8:00 every morning she wakes up.
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So yeah, it’s just nice to um again have that confidence and be flexible with my baby and trust her and trust my
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instincts and not go off what the internet tells me is normal or not.
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So what I say to everyone when we finish up, I am your if you need anything around sleep, parenting or anything,
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Google I’m your Google. message me, you know, tell me, ask me because, you know, we, you know, I love getting to know my families and it, it ends up being like
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a, you know, a friendship in the community because I want the best for you and your family and that every single family I work with, I feel exactly the same and that hasn’t
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changed. I don’t think it’s ever going to change. I just feel such joy um that I’m here to be able to go through everything I’ve been through, but also
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um you know, I’ve done the study, I’ve done the research, continue to with lived experience, and then that it works. I’m like I’m like the light at
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the end of the tunnel. I didn’t have that. I was like, is it a train or is it the light at the end of the tunnel? I don’t know. [laughter] I want to be the light. So, yeah.
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Now, you’ve been amazing. Thank you, Donna. I really appreciate um all of the work that you’ve put in and the support you’ve provided to us.
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You guys, too. Like I said, it’s not just me. So, thank you so much and I will see you soon. I’ll speak to you soon. And thank you for sharing your story.
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No worries. Have a great day. Bye. See you.

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